Define boundaries & consent
Let's make it clear
We created this space to help everyone recognize, name, and process boundary-crossing—whether you experienced it or think you might’ve caused it.
unblur
🧭 What Are Boundaries?
Boundaries are limits we set to protect our well-being. They define what feels safe for us—physically, emotionally, socially, sexually, digitally, or energetically. Everyone has different boundaries, and they can change depending on the person, context, or moment.
Boundaries can sound like:
“I don’t want to talk about that right now.”
“I’d rather not be touched.”
“I need time to think before responding.”
“I don't like that joke”
"I don't want to meet"
“Please don’t comment on my body.”
Etc.
Boundaries are not controlling or dramatic.
They are communication tools rooted in self-respect—and they require practice, not perfection.
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✅ How to Know You’re Respecting Someone’s Boundaries:
SEE REAL-LIFE BOUNDARY EXAMPLES- You pause and listen when they show discomfort.
- You don’t push when someone hesitates.
- You ask before touching, venting, or assuming.
- You accept a “no” without needing an explanation.
- You’re okay with silence or needing space.
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❗ Signs a Boundary Is Being Crossed (Even Subtly):
CHECK YOUR OWN BOUNDARIES- You feel pressured or manipulated to say yes.
- You agree but feel tense or unsure.
- Someone laughs off or minimizes your discomfort.
- They continue after you’ve already said no.
- You leave feeling confused, drained, or unsafe.
- If you express your feelings and boundaries, they get defensive, angry, they blame you, victimize themselves or twist the story.
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🧠 If You’re Unsure If Something Was Okay…
REFLECT ANONYMOUSLYThat’s a sign worth listening to.
Reflection isn’t weakness—it’s care.✨ How UNBLUR Can Help
We created this space to help everyone recognize, name, and process boundary-crossing—whether you experienced it or think you might’ve caused it.
You can learn, take accountability, and do better.
Everyone is welcome here.
unblur
💬 What Is Consent?
Consent is clear, freely given, ongoing agreement to engage in something together—whether it’s a hug, a conversation, or a sexual act.
Consent is:
- Specific: Yes to one thing doesn’t mean yes to everything.
- Reversible: You can say yes, then change your mind at any time.
- Informed: You know what you're saying yes to.
- Voluntary: Not pressured, guilted, or manipulated.
- Enthusiastic: Not “fine” or “if you want”—but “I want this too”.
🚩 What Consent Is Not:
- Silence or lack of resistance.
- “They didn’t say no”.
- Being in a relationship.
- Someone freezing in the moment.
- “They seemed fine afterward”.
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🧊 There’s No Such Thing as a Perfect Reaction
COMMON MYTHS ABOUT CONSENTWhen someone crosses a boundary, we don’t always respond the way we think we “should.”
Some people freeze. Some stay quiet. Some laugh it off. Some say “yes” because they’re scared or unsure how to say “no.”That doesn’t make it okay.
That doesn’t make it their fault. -
💡 Why People Might Not Say No Clearly:
QUICK “WAS THAT OK?” GUIDE- Fear of upsetting someone they know or care about.
- Social pressure to “go along with it” or “not make it awkward”.
- Power dynamics (with a boss, teacher, partner, friend).
- Trauma response: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.
- Confusion or self-doubt: “Am I overreacting?”.
- They’ve been taught to stay polite, quiet, or accommodating
Their inability to say no doesn’t make it their fault.
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🫶 What This Means
REFLECT ANONYMOUSLY- Just because someone didn’t push back doesn’t mean it was okay.
- Just because they stayed doesn’t mean they wanted it.
- Just because they smiled doesn’t mean they felt safe.
- If someone felt violated—even quietly, even days later—it still counts.
✨ How UNBLUR Can Help
We created this space to help everyone recognize, name, and process boundary-crossing—whether you experienced it or think you might’ve caused it.
You can learn, take accountability, and do better.
Everyone is welcome here.
If something left you feeling unsafe, uncomfortable, disrespected, ashamed, or confused
when you said no, or even if you couldn't say it or freeze up — it’s valid to explore whether it was harassment. Your feelings matter more than the intention of the other person.
Thanks for trusting us — let’s go step by step in organizing what you experienced, using the UNBLUR lens of harassment, so you can validate your experience with clarity and compassion.